http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Head_transplant
Head transplantation inevitably involves decapitating the patient. Although it has been successfully performed using dogs, monkeys and rats, no human is known to have undergone the procedure.
Um, ok. Thank you, Google. I was actually searching for Dogfish Head Brewery, but this is… good enough?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarantula_hawk
When the wasp larva hatches, it rips a small hole in the spider’s abdomen, then plunges into the spider’s belly and feeds voraciously, avoiding vital organs for as long as possible to keep it fresh… Finally, the wasp becomes an adult, and tears open the spider’s belly to get out.
Tarantula wasps are also nectarivorous. The consumption of fermented fruit sometimes intoxicates them to the point that flight becomes difficult.
So the tarantula hawk is a bug that can kill a tarantula AND likes getting hammered? Badass.
That is, in theory. From afar. In practice… WHY THE FUCK WAS THIS IN MY BACKYARD AND NOW I AM TERRIFIED AND AM GOING TO HAVE NIGHT TERRORS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Penis_panic
[DSM-IV-TR] gives koro’s definition as “a term, probably of Malaysian origin, that refers to an episode of sudden and intense anxiety that the penis (or, in females, the vulva and nipples) will recede into the body and possibly cause death.”
…in general, Asians with complaints of genital retraction believe that the condition is fatal, unlike most Westerners.
Extreme Shrinkage? Oh come now. Let your Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy guide you—Don’t Panic!
To be fair, though, I’d probably rather die than have an innie penis.
Also, this: http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-april-28-2008/penis-theft-panic-update
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Globster
A globster, or blob, is an unidentified organic mass that washes up on the shoreline of an ocean or other body of water. The term was coined by Ivan T. Sanderson in 1962 to describe the Tasmanian carcass of 1960, which was said to have “no visible eyes, no defined head, and no apparent bone structure”.
It’s too bad the definition is limited to things that wash up on the beach. I know plenty of people that I’d classified as globsters, if I didn’t know any better…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BP
Who are these bastards, anyway?
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All shenanigans aside, here are ways you can help the Gulf Coast while sitting on your ass in front of your computer with your credit card in your pocket. It’s the least you can do.
Help provide the families in the Gulf with emergency assistance (food, rent, etc.) with United Way: http://www.unitedway.org/gulfrecovery
Help find and save the wildlife covered in oil, and recover the ecosystem that sustains them with The National Wildlife Federation: http://www.nwf.org/
Help the long-term recover of the Gulf’s natural habitats with The Nature Conservancy: http://www.nature.org/wherewework/northamerica/gulfofmexico/
We all live on this planet.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borborygmus
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I never know what to say when someone asks me, “What’s your favorite food?” I don’t think in terms of absolutes, because something I crave one day might seem gross the next. I just try to feel what food my mouth is whining for, ignore it until it cries in the corner by itself, then stuff some of that food inside so it shuts up and showers me with love instead of whiny complaints. Gratitude, not Attitude. I’ll make a great parent one day.
Personally, I just made some Thai chicken basil stir-fry—much like this. That is most definitely the answer to the sadness of my mouth.
So, tell me…if you could stave your grumbling borborygmi by stuffing something in your mouth RIGHT NOW—anything—what would it be?
